Finding Joy As You Start Over

Rebooting your life can be a daunting process but I found joy in the little details of my fresh start. The thoughts alone can be overwhelming but by slowing down you can find joy in each moment. There is peace and happiness within this important period of your life.

To save money I ordered my furniture online and it would arrive over a few months. Prior to picking up the keys to my new place I purchased an air mattress. I wanted to make sure that I had a bed because that was really all I needed. I also grabbed 3 white plastic stackable chairs to double as kitchen and living room furniture. I made a list of essential items that I would need in the first few days. I moved in with five small bags of personal items, an air mattress and 3 plastic chairs. I felt like the happiest person on the earth.

That night was like camping as I solved for each challenge. I wanted to watch a movie on my tablet but the wifi was weeks away from being installed. I used my phone’s hotspot to get online and enjoyed a movie. Then I ordered a bunch of items and services that I needed. I had an overwhelming sense of satisfaction and gratitude that night. I was on my own and making my way.

The next morning I was awakened by the sun shining on my face. For the first time in a very long time I woke up at peace. It felt so amazingly good and I wanted to savor the moment. I got up and begin going through the bags to find the items I needed to get ready for my day. It truly felt like a dream.

Over the next few weeks I moved the rest of my personal belongings. Eventually the furniture started arriving and my once empty house was began to feel like home. When my king bed was delivered, I put the queen air mattress right on the platform. And yes, it looked so silly but I found pleasure in it. Plus I needed to be able to walk around in there. Weeks later my mattress arrived and I had the chance to add the finishing touches to my room. It was perfect for me.

I had ordered a beautiful sofa sectional and waited a few months for the delivery. This was the last of the large items. Imagine my shock when it arrived and didn’t fit through the front door. My old home had double doors and deliveries were never an issue. I had to send it back. Lesson well learned. I was able to order a smaller sectional in the same fabric and color. That would be another twelve weeks of waiting. When it arrived it had what appeared to be a box cutter slit on the arm. So half of the new sectional had to be replaced. All I could do was laugh.

When my nightstands arrived they were way too heavy to lift. So I rolled each box end over end up the stairs which was not easy. I was stubborn and didn’t want to ask for help. I  was finding my strength in many ways. It was important for me to accomplish tasks on my own. This was a necessary step in establishing my independence.

Divorce creates a space for you to reinvent yourself. Take it slow and learn to enjoy the process. The ups and downs have a purpose. Get to know yourself. Laugh in the awkward moments. Celebrate life’s lessons. Cry with joy. But most importantly remember that this is the journey and you will be stronger for it.

Regina H.