Recently my coparent was doing some paperwork for one the kids and he reached out to me because he needed the shot records. Given his history of misplacing paperwork, I suggested that he come over and make a copy. Later that day he came by and made copies.

A few days later I woke up and decided to relax in bed for a quiet morning. Within a few minutes my coparent texted me to say that he had lost the shot record and he needed me to take it to his house before I went in to work. He was going to need it that evening. Are you serious?

Everything in me was so frustrated. I knew he would lose it which is why I didn’t give him the original. I’m trying to rest and here he comes disturbing my peace. I should just tell him it’s his problem and he should work it out. It’s going to cut into my workout time too. He should clean up his clutter and maybe he could keep track of things. Every insult ran through my mind. I wanted to fire off on him.

Ultimately it was for my child. I could have sounded off but was that the best option? No. He was taking care of something and he made a mistake. I’m capable of making a mistake. Is he always as gracious? No. It’s not all about me. So I got up, made a copy and took it to his house.

I texted him to say that I had left the shot record on his island. Then I said “Plain Idiot”. It’s an inside joke about a family member who locked his keys in the car, his dad arrived with the key and said “Plain Idiot”. Then they laughed so hard about it. We have laughed about this over the years. He later told me that he laughed out loud at work when I said it. Then he had to explain the outburst to his coworker who laughed too.

The correct response is always going to be the one that allows you to walk away with the family in tact. We need to come away from being mean for the sake of scoring points. When you have the opportunity to be right or kind, always choose to be kind. It goes a long way.

Regina H