Now that I’ve told my husband that I am filing for divorce, I just feel numb. It feels like I am going through the motions. After our initial conversation I went away for two nights so that we could have some space. In the mornings I would go to work and in the evenings I would go back to the hotel and have dinner by myself. This was going to be my new life and I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about it. I just knew that it was refreshing to be away. I was reconnecting with the real me. I could do whatever I wanted and that was an amazing feeling.

For weeks I had been in preparation for the conversation and the wave of emotions would hit me hard. Sometimes they would overpower me and I would have to stop to cry. I remember going to get a post office box for my mail since I wouldn’t be moving for a while. I just couldn’t believe that this was where I had landed and I started crying at the counter. Every time I would become overwhelmed I tried my best to address the emotions in the moment. I reminded myself that I had given this marriage all that I had and it was still not enough. I knew that I no longer wanted to suppress anything. Suppression was too costly and I needed to get in touch with my true feelings.

Many nights I would walk for an hour. That gave me time to process and plan. With so many decisions to be made I wanted to be on top of things. Where would I live? What would the schedule for the kids look like? How would we divide the assets? This time allowed me to think about it all. In addition to that I could also focus on my physical health. I would always feels good after a long walk. I could feel my confidence returning.

It wasn’t long before I started losing weight. Weight loss is definitely a part of divorce and break up. The stress can be enormous. Walking and working out became my outlet. I can honestly say that it helped me tremendously. People started to notice my weight loss, I would just tell them that I was working out and I was feeling good. Only my closest friends needed to know that I was in a a battle for my life. This was a battle that I was determined to win.

Ali M

When I started Alimonia Life I was unsure of the direction, I just knew that I wanted to
create a safe space for anyone who found themselves on the road to divorce.
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