Let's face it divorce is not an easy process. You have to deal with the consequences that appear as a result of the separation. Unfortunately, anger is one of the top by-products that can easily stick with you for some time. 

Caution: It may ruin your life...

Anger is a normal emotion that you will have to deal with if you want to move forward in life. Feeling enraged is attached to one's emotions and what you have been through during the divorce process. Talk about me, I've been through this phase. You can work through your anger.

I remember the kind of person I used to be before my divorce. I hardly shouted or conflicted with anyone. Hard to describe really... Anger ruined my life more than the divorce itself... 

But, they say: "No Pain No Gain"

So, in order to reach the heights of positivity, one has to cope with the negativity, which in our case is ANGER. 

But how to deal with anger related to divorce?

No two people have the same feelings or emotions that lead to anger. Some people are cool-minded and take time to comprehend the situations while others can lose temperament just like hot burners. I being the later one, initially found it hard to control my temper. I used to feel pumped, and ready to fight whenever anger took hold. 

However, I followed some tips to calm my body in heightened circumstances. Let me share a few with you...

The best way to control anger is to identify the symptoms that provoke your anger. think of a peaceful place and mentally take yourself to that place. Take some deep breaths, let everything settle down, and close your eyes for a few seconds. It really worked for me.

Journaling has helped calm many furious minds. If you think you have something to say to your ex then sit down and write a letter or keep a journal for such moments. Write your feelings in words and release it from your mind. once you free your mind, you will be able to think clearly. Thinking clearly allows you to make better decisions.

If you have kids, never bad mouth your ex in front of them. They are quick learners and they will internalize the negativity. Negative comments are one of the most common responses to anger. Think about their development, and how it will affect their life. We want our kids to grow up with healthy attitudes regarding their emotions.

Drinking water can also calm your aggressiveness. Water has a cooling effect and it will allow you some time to reconsider the act of anger you are about to take. So the next time you feel flustered, try to drink a glass of water. If any of these tips work, that would be great. But if you fail to control the anger, you will be at loss. Your kids are counting on you to teach them how to deal with their emotions in a healthy way. If you continue to struggle with your anger, you can join anger management classes or see a therapist. You have a choice.

Hamza Aslam